Postpartum Support
In the days following a loss, it is important to remember that a body has just given birth, and the physical recuperation is just the same, but compounded by traumatic grief.
Having a sensitive postpartum doula who understands the grief the accompanies baby loss and respects what a family may be feeling and need in the days ahead. Frequently, friends and even family shy away from the darkness because they are fearful. By modeling what good grief support looks like, they offer support to the family's loved ones as well. The research is very clear that non-judgemental support and holding space with a family through loss, reduces negative psychological outcomes. Families need community support more than ever at this time- with "time' being defined by the family. Grief isn't something that ever goes away or has parameters.
Traditional and Bereavement
Postpartum Doula Care
Along with traditional postpartum doula care, a bereavement doula:
- Guides families in seeking answers to their questions and provides information in multiple formats
- Respects the disorder instead of imposing order by accepting a broad range of grief reactions without becoming judgmental
- Listens as parents talk about how they feel
- Identifies ways to deal with stress
- Creates safe spaces where parents can feel free to express themselves as they touch mementos, view pictures and display reminders of their baby
- Acknowledges the normalcy of their individual experience and that they "can’t do grief wrong."
- Encourages the setting of small goals and to do things that bring joy
- Connects families with local support groups or peer support that can make the experience less lonely as well as provide a perspective on the loss process
- Suggests creating culture specific remembrance rituals that will resonate with the family
- Supports home funerals
"What makes a mother feel cared for is when she is reminded of her resilience."
– Swanson
Women with a history of pregnancy loss are at increased risk for depression and anxiety, including post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), after the birth of a child. Parents with complicated bereavement will be recognized and with permission, referred to other healthcare professionals.
A bereavement doula maintains a hope-filled attitude that families will survive this, help suggest meaningful remembrance rituals and embrace the transformation that the future holds.